Dr. Gottman is an American psychologist who established the Gottman Institute (https://www.gottman.com/), A Research Based Approach to Relationships. Dr. Gottman has done extensive research on marriage and divorce and children’s emotional development. He wrote How to Raise an Emotionally Healthy Child. Bang on.
Dr. Gottman has come up with 5 steps steps to emotion coaching. These steps are intended to help parents foster emotional wellness in their children. Here they are, according to https://www.gottman.com/blog/an-introduction-to-emotion-coaching/.
- Be aware of your child’s emotion.
- Recognize your child’s expression of emotion as a perfect moment for intimacy and teaching.
- Listen with empathy and validate your child’s feelings.
- Help your child learn to label his emotions with words.
- Set limits when you are helping your child to solve problems or deal with upsetting situations appropriately.
I like how this list takes us through the whole process in an easy to remember way. It makes sense. It sounds easy to apply.
Now..to see if it actually IS easy to apply I will wait for the opportunity. I predict it will take 27 seconds for one to arise in this household.